Hi Undisclosed, thank you for your response. My kids were around the same age as yours when I left my spouse. They are now 28 and 31. It gets better, but it takes a while. The worst thing I did was find another man and married him without taking my time to heal. That second husband was also abusive, but in a different way. After another six years and finally divorced for the second time, I got divorced.

I coped by journaling, going to Al-Anon, and lots of therapy. I’ll tell you I’m in a much better place. I married a third time to a wonderful man who doesn’t have an ounce of abusiveness in his body. My kids are grown and leading their own lives without current abuse, but even they have anger issues and their baggage sometimes shows itself. I work to give them the parental support they need.

I’ve written several articles about domestic abuse. My first one was this, describing my past relationship:

I have many more. I go through phases of what I write about, but most are related to DV and recoving from trauma. Right now I’m in a space in my writing where I write about warning signs of abuse, before the abuse starts happening. Please read them if you get a chance, and email me anytime.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store